Jugnee

(Writing this note from my iPhone intoxicated by the Kauai waters and a Lomi Lomi massage on the beach...so there's bound to be an impact of that madness called 'life')

At these turquoise water shores I found my other self (an alter ego, a spirit animal ...whatever name you give it) and it's a firefly (a glow bug).

Jugnee- "Jugni/ Jugnee (Punjabi/Gurumukhi: ਜੁਗਨੀ, Hindi: जुगनी, Urdu: جگنی) is a Punjabi word which literally means a female firefly. (Jugnu = Firefly)

However, coming to poetry, Jugni has a specific figurative importance, as the word is used for an observer from whose perspective the poetry is written, as well as the spirit of life, the essence of life in spiritual poetry."

I've grown up the elder sibling (the eldest and first generation child on both sides of the family), always the responsible one, the wise one who knows how to pick the right path and stick with it. Who guides everyone that needs an anchor. The one your friends' mom trusts always. In it, always the expectation of perfection and the joy that brings to everyone. I loved that part to play, still do. But I'm not defined by it or obliged to be a role model (not anymore). In that sense, I've been a jugnee since I've known myself.

And the other part of me...the free spirit, the creative self that knows no boundaries. That believes everything is possible. That looks at mundane everyday things and can find magic in them and if not, turn it to magic. Who sings and dances to the beat of another world. Who can protect her loved ones from harms way. Who knows there are things waiting to be explored outside of this being...who is a gypsy soul. There's the jugnee!

The years, experiences, and just life in general jaded the jugnee spirit in me a little. It was faded not lost. I'm happy to report the finding of this self. And to that end, here's a song dedicated to me!!

https://youtu.be/gjaH2iuoYWE