And so this is the third time I've attempted to start this entry...clearly my thoughts are not forthcoming today. I'm unsure about what it is that brought me here, and whether what got me here is something I want to see take a form of these words and watch. I'm a 'convenience' human being...I hate confrontations..but I believe I love them. As you probably know by now, my desire to express is overwhelming...when i love, when i hate, when i desire, when i envy, when i bless, when i care...not that I'm an extremist. I like to believe that I am a balance of practicality and unrealism (is that even a word???)...and so it was 'Surreal..surreal but nice'...words borrowed from someone, somewhere...

Toukey told me that I ought to stop calling him that...now that he is set to become a 'family man'...the heck does that mean? I'm freaking out...is a 'family man' supposed to be different from 'my buddy' man?

..And so these last couple of days I've been down with a throat jam (most painful in the morning, I've had the urge to cut out my throat and get on with my day...and i've had this gross feeling more than just once!)...and I've missed the care of Pune...I've missed the warmth...the love...and I've valued still more....

I definitely need a new phone...no panel change, no battery change...NEW PHONE...I'm still so gulity about losing my precious phone...it wasnt even my fault...why do i take it so hard on myself???I need to learn to move on...

...and learn to not drift away during these extra lectures in the evening...when u've barely slept the night before...

..and yet a drifter's all I've ever been...in mind, in soul...drifting away looking for something!